by Dr. Glenn Wilcox, D.O.M.
Sacred sexuality has been both a personal and professional exploration of mine for a few decades. Various approaches to sacred sexuality evolved in a number of cultures across the planet throughout history. Lack of knowledge about such practices in America is often due to the relatively repressive attitudes about sexuality that we have generally chosen to accept in our society. However, an exciting change in access to this knowledge and an openness to exploring this traditional wisdom is now becoming more common. As a result, we are freer to explore, experience and evolve as individuals and as a people. This is a clear way to greater love between individuals and within societies.
The energy increased, shared and released during sexual desire, erotic stimulation, orgasm and intimate connection with others is among the most powerful a person can experience. Using that blissful energy to improve physical and psychological health has long been realized as an essential aspect of the traditional medicine that developed over the millennia in China. During the past couple of decades, some of the sacred sexual practices of Taoists from China have been revealed to the west along with Tantric practices from India. Quodoushka, the traditional sexual wisdom of Mesoamerica has come to light in this decade. Of course, there is more to explore. Each of these traditional bodies of knowledge has value. And, to be perfectly clear, what I present here is also congruent with the teachings of Christ. However, we now have an opportunity to use this sacred sexual wisdom as a foundation from which we can evolve our sexual interactions to higher levels of pleasure, contentment, [connection] intimacy, love, vitality and expanded consciousness. That, in simple words, is sacred sexuality.
There are many paths through the forest of sacred sexuality. We amazing human beings are each unique and what stirs and inspires one will not do so for another.
In this article I’ll briefly describe the first steps to explore on your sacred sexuality journey. Of course, they are also essential to regular old-fashioned good sex!
Beginner’s Mind: In my opinion, the fundamental first step to exploring sexuality at any level is a willingness to embrace a beginner’s mind. Allow me to be blunt. Almost every woman I have been with has shared with me that almost every man they have been with did not truly know how to touch or be inside them and was not willing to find out from them what really aroused them. From discussions with men I’ve learned that they feel the same. Women often don’t know how to touch a man or move and hold and squeeze him inside her. Of course, touching includes touching with your lips and tongue and even the inside of your mouth and throat. Touching is a sacred art. Discover! Explore like a beginner. Begin gently. Build to assertiveness with sensitivity. Then, when the moment is right, be wild and free! I’ll be candid, I don’t have much same-sex experience, but I suspect similar holds true.
Touch & Energy: Be aware that there is vital energy circulating throughout your body and you can focus that vital energy through your palms and fingers, your lips and tongue. Become sensitive to this magic resource and share it as you touch your lover.
Orgasm: Orgasms are awesome and can be a powerful source of energy for your journey. However, an orgasm need not always be the goal. In fact, over the past decade, Orgasmic Meditation or OM arose in popularity. OM is a mindfulness meditation practice. One person gently, rhythmically strokes the clitoris of a woman in a very specific way. Orgasms may result but are not the goal. Connective resonance is.
Female Orgasm: Orgasms for women are complex and highly variable. Females may experience single or multiple orgasms. Once upon a time in the west over a half century ago, it was believed that multiple orgasms were very rare. Over the years as word got out and knowledge spread, more and more women began to experience multiple orgasms. Now they are considered a common medical fact!
Women may also experience what are considered clitoral orgasms and G-spot orgasms. The G-spot is a highly sensitive area inside a women’s vagina that is actually the root of the clitoris. I am always surprised by how many women and men question me about G-spot orgasms – can they really happen, how do you do it, where’s the G-spot?
Recently, the hot new interest is female ejaculation, or “squirting” as it is commonly referred to. Again, this is a very real and pleasurable response that most women can experience with appropriate stimulation and if they feel relaxed, safe, and cared for by their lover.
Unfortunately, studies reveal that a significant percentage of women have never experienced an orgasm. Most often, that can be changed with knowledge, sensitivity, skill and even hormones such as oxytocin.
Male Orgasm: Generally, male orgasms are considered to be much simpler than female orgasms. May I suggest this is false. We men have the potential for amazing variability in our orgasms. For example, back in the 90s, I came across an interesting book titled The Multi-Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia. So, I set about mastering that skill. For a man it is conventionally believed that orgasm and ejaculation are one and the same. Not true. We men can learn to have orgasms without ejaculating. As you can imagine, learning this ability will open up vast new horizons for both your pleasure and that of your partner. While that book will provide you with a good starting point, my experience is that other related techniques can be mastered that will add even more dimension to your multiple orgasms.
Hormones: There are a number of hormones that are essential to a healthy desire, optimal sexual function and the energy needed to connect. I have written a couple of articles in previous issues of Truly Alive describing this hormone symphony and how to improve it. You can find these articles in the January/February and March/April 2019 issues. (You can actually find all of my articles on the Truly Alive website by searching my name.)
Energy: The number one reason women give for lack of interest in sex is not enough energy. I was called to a career in energy medicine 45 years ago. So many options are available for improving your energy and vitality!
Sexual Rejuvenation: I provide several therapies at my clinic Wise Medicine® focused on male and female sexual rejuvenation. PRP (platelet rich plasma) injections contain growth factors that can stimulate angiogenesis, the development of new blood vessels, and enhance more sensitive nerve endings. Pressure Wave Therapy (some call it shockwave) that uses powerful sound waves has been used in Europe for years and proven successful for erectile dysfunction. It can also be used to improve prostate health along with other therapies. Prostate health is critical to male sexual performance. PWT is now also being used to improve female sexual response. Over the past four decades, I’ve also developed a system of deep abdominal organ massage to improve circulation of blood and fluids and rejuvenate stagnant tissues in the lower abdominal area. There is much more…
Circulation and Nitric Oxide: Good circulation is essential to good sex. Exercise helps. Improving the production of nitric oxide is essential. Nitric oxide is produced by the endothelium in blood vessels and relaxes their smooth muscle walls allowing for greater blood flow. In simple terms, that’s how Viagra works. Also, elimination of toxic metal build-up in the blood vessels can free up better production of nitric oxide. In addition, there are natural supplements that have been proven effective.
Sleep & Relaxation: Good sleep is essential for good sex. For example, European studies found that for men and women, testosterone levels declined 12% for every hour less than 8 hours of sleep the subject got per night. So, if you push it and get only 6 hours, your testosterone will drop almost 25%! A majority of people in America function too much on sympathetic nervous system overdrive – fright, fight, flight – due to the stress of our lives. The parasympathetic nervous system – rest, digest, restore – is not properly nurtured by many. A healthy balanced parasympathetic system is essential for sexual performance.
Sacred Sexuality: One might propose there are two primary forces in the universe – love and fear. Satisfying, invigorating good sex has many benefits. From there, the way is open to exploring sacred sexuality…the expansion of consciousness and the enhancement of intimacy and love. Enjoy each step along the way!
Community Events: On the third Thursday of each month, I provide free presentations at my clinic Wise Medicine® on a variety of subjects, many related to sex, energy and sacred sexuality.
At Wise Medicine, I offer a free 10-minute introductory consultation focused on helping you decide if the unique, extensive and highly effective services I provide are an essential part of your wise health strategy. Call to schedule an appointment and come on in!